Thursday, December 27, 2012

Another sad goodbye

It has taken me several days to get to the point where I can make this post.  The man in the photo at the right is Joseph A Kidd. He was known to many people on any number of social networking sites as "JAZKidd".  I became acquainted with this very interesting but troubled person in 2005, while both of us were using the social network MSN Spaces.  His pages contained a lot of typos (which he unabashedly owned - stating that he hated to type and didn't care about spelling or punctuation) but it also was a very candid glimpse into the person that he was.  His humour was biting, and often at your expense, but if he took the time to "poke" you, you also knew that he at least tolerated you (his words) and that being said, you had a friend and jousting partner for the rest of your life.

He was very careful about what he shared and with whom, but I was fortunate enough to gain a glimpse of the real person, and found him to be intriguing, sometimes vulnerable, and for all his bravado and aggressiveness, he was truly a boy at heart, looking for someone that he could trust -- to be there, to accept him with all his flaws and shortcomings, and to cherish him in spite of all of them.  His life was a difficult one and it put him in a place where he was constantly fighting for his dignity.  He searched for comfort in many ways, and I truly believe that his addictions were the result of that search.  It grieves me to say that as he approached his last day, he reached out to me by phone and I missed the call.  He left me a voice mail saying he would try back another time...the next time we will talk, my friend, will be when we meet in whatever place we go to after this one.

Joseph died on December 17, 2012, of a massive heart attack at the age of 44. I made this discovery on December 25, while visiting his Facebook profile to convey holiday greetings.  He had multiple health issues that had plagued him throughout his life, and this was the culmination of his short life of intentional self-abuse.  His mother still survives him in Florida.  Family has indicated that she is currently in a coma.  If she comes out of it, they will have to convey this sad news to her as well.  Joseph's earthly remains will be cremated and given to his mother if she survives.

It is in no way overly dramatic to say that Joseph touched many lives around the world, and there are many people who will feel the affects of his passing.  It saddens me to think that it is possible that he never even realized how much he meant in the lives of so many.  Your memory will be cherished, my friend.  I will think of you with much affection always.